Last Ten

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Tag Archive: alexandra naughton

They want to build a lab.
They want to reprogram the environment.
They want to make you palatable.
They don’t want you to win.
At least not in a way that helps you any.

Like time and space and yadda yadda yadda.
I’m sick of repeating myself.
I’m ready to be soft.
I’m ready to be flesh.

I want to take my skin off like fruit from paring knife
in one long continuous spiral.
Let you get to know me better.

I want to show you my ragged seams, that I have nothing to hide

Taking control of my timeline. In the littlest ways possible. With as few expectations as possible.

Don’t equate sex with vulnerability. Don’t be so superficial.

Dig around a little. Get some earth under your fingernails. Take advantage of the open spaces. Analyze my nonconscious input, where my decisions are made.
Before I can think about them.
Before I can overthink about any of them.

Dried out and oozing. Splayed out and knowing.

You could never disappoint me more than I’ve already disappointed myself.
You could never troll me more than I’ve already trolled myself.

I am available and I am forgiving, and you are random.

Let’s keep it unreal. Let’s keep it accountable.

I wrote a chapbook today.

sext: 1996 Romeo and Juliet is tacky as fuck and hella 90s but I think it’s perfect.

Wouldn’t it be really cool to just lay in a field

Feeling like a less coordinated Ms. Frizzle.

Remember the time I was asked to do a poetry reading and instead of reading I just cried on stage into a microphone for 8 minutes and wiped snot and tears on my sleeve before walking to the back of the bookstore and crying more.

It’s kind of hard to believe good things are happening to you when you’ve been conditioned to believe that good things aren’t supposed to happen to you.

Yeah but, how do you feel about my brand.

A bird just took a shit in my hair. ‪#‎awp2015‬

Note to self: I am going to die.

I write narcissislit. Can you not fuck with my aesthetic.

Feeling like a first season Nancy Botwin.

Basically my life has become a longform version of Don’t Tell Mom The Babysitter’s Dead and I am Christina Applegate except I’m working for a neuroscientist instead of a company that makes ugly uniforms.

Talking to people in real life is hard because I can’t just send them a blue cat sticker when I don’t know how to respond.

My name is Alexandra Naughton and you can find me on facebook commenting on a status near you.

frontal of house. hear voice yelling at girl walking down street.

voice: hey! hey, you! c’mere!

girl: what. where are you.

voice: c’mere. over to the side of the house.

girl: why. what. who are you even.

voice: just c’mere! come on..

girl: (warily walks up driveway to side of house) okay (looking around)

voice: look down! (a hand flaps out of a basement window)

girl: (crouching down) what are you doing down there.

voice: i’m on punishment. and i’m really bored.

girl: on punishment. why, what did you do.

voice: it was my parents who put me in this doomed cell about two days ago.

girl: but why.

voice: (face becomes visible) because I took some cookies from the kitchen before dinnertime.

girl: so they locked you in the basement.

face: yes.

girl: that is terrible.

face: i know. life is awful. i hate being forced to learn a lesson.

girl: it seems pretty harsh for dessert theft, but i guess you won’t do it again.

face: i wouldn’t really say that.. this method of punishment makes me want some type of revenge. and i’ll probably take more cookies.

girl: but won’t you get punished again. are cookies really worth it.

face: my mom makes a mean chocolate chip.

girl: it’s your life. how much more time do you have left down there.

face: probably four days more. and i want out.

girl: my god, they’re keeping you in a dark basement for a week. how do you deal. can’t your parents get in trouble for this.

face: what do you mean.

girl: this is clearly child endangerment. it’s against the law..

face: you mean i could sue my parents.

girl: most definitely. this is cruel and unusual punishment, and for something so minor.

face: so you mean if i tell the courts how mistreated i am i could get a lot of money.

girl: i guess you could, yeah, but your parents should know that this isn’t okay.

face: and i could put my parents in jail and have the whole house to myself and be really rich.

girl: i don’t know if it works that way, but i guess anything is possible. maybe it would make sense to do some type of family counseling first though.

adult’s voice: (off camera) darling! lunch is ready!

face: (looking in direction of adult’s voice) i’ll be right up, ma!

girl: that’s your mom.

face: (turns to face girl) yeah, so will you help me escape.

girl: escape, how. when.

adult’s voice: i made tuna sandwiches! let’s eat lunch and we can go to the playground afterward.

face: (turns back to direction of adult’s voice) one sec, ma!

adult’s voice: come on, you’ve been playing in the basement all day.

girl: playing, but i thought… (stands up and starts walking away)

face: (to girl) no wait, wait, you’ve gotta help me!

adult’s voice: come on and let’s eat, i made lemonade too!

fin.

I wrote this when I was 15 and I feel like I was trying to write a dark fucking rugrats episode or something.